http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HoRkntoHkIE

had a serious kind of conversation with my bf. usually the conversation i would be kinda iffy on bringing up cus it kinda takes a toll on our relationship and can either tip the boat or keep it afloat. but i brought it up anyways, and im glad i did. it made me realize that im no longer afraid to to bring up risky topics, by risky, i meant topics that can make or break, topics that can change us, how we feel and think or act towards each other. but i promised to always tell him whats up, so i did. and we listened, responded, and understood, in a way that was mature and understanding. we both took it well, better than i thought, and even though it was a make or break topic situation, for some reason, it brought us closer, or at least i suddenly felt closer, more than ive ever have, now that i realized it. and its a crazy kind of feeling, where you can talk about really intense topics especially if its a topic about making it or breaking it. i feel suddenly stronger with him, our relationship stronger, especially our communitcation. its no longer text, but talking. im happy, we started of young, and growing our relationship together. this is what ive been wanting, to communicate like this to each other since communicating and being able to talk is a big thing for me. i feel lik i can truly be honest with him about how i feel, my emotions, what i want and dont want with out the fear that he wont understand, or the fear that what i say will suddenly spurr a break up. that is somthing i use to be afraid off, of rocking the boat, but not no more, i feel more comfortable and really close to him. this thanksgiving break, this entire week, has been tough, emotionally exhausting, and we were both at the breaking point in out relationship. but something happend, and we stuck together, and im not sure how, why, or what it is out there, but it kept us together admist the adversity that we may have felt. and i think back, that if that one day, we were to have broken up, we wouldnt have gotten to this point in our relationship now. and its just so crazy to think about it, after everything, he is still here with me. all the emotional distress, the thinking, the hurt, confusion we both felt, this thanks giving break ended on a good note, even though we still need things to figure out. all and all i just feel closer and more comfortable expressing myself to him, my true self with nothing, no fear, nothing held back, like i was before. is it fate or coincidence, do things happen for a reason, things that tests us, our relationship, who we are, and who we are to each other? i dont really know, but this thanksgiving break is a break i dont think i will ever forget. goodnight.